Have you ever quit because of stress/anxiety?

I’ve been working at this job for 11 months and I’m thinking of quitting constantly.

I’m a senior dev on a project that’s giving me terrible stress and anxiety. I just can’t seem to keep it together. I don’t sleep well and even though my psychologist keeps telling me to not do so much overtime, exercise etc … I just can’t adjust.

I’m wondering if some of you have quit your job without another one lined up. I have enough savings to be on my own for about 2 months.

Any of you guys have been in a similar situation?

I have been working for myself for a long time, but when I was younger and worked at a series of random jobs, there were a couple of times that I had to quit in order to avoid losing my mind, even though I had no other job lined up or much savings. I was lucky to have friends and family, and eventually SSI, to help me out at the time. If I did not, I probably would have ended up homeless because there was no way I could have kept working.

2 months savings may be enough to have a break and regroup and hopefully find a new job that is less stressful. Good luck, whatever you decide to do!

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A few years ago, yes. I was in a particularly bad job in a very toxic environment. I had to get out and probably waited too long before I did. Stress & anxiety was already eating away at my soul. I landed a new job (I wasn’t too picky), but the relief of having left my old job was immediately replaced with a different, but comparably hopeless situation. That’s when anxiety really hit hard.

In my country there is no such thing as two weeks notice: in my case it was 2 full months, i.e. you give notice today (April 6th or April 30th, doesn’t matter) and you are out July 1st. You start a new employment contract with a trial month, in which either party can give notice immediately. The idea of having to stick around for almost 3 months terrified and paralysed me even worse than my precaurious savings situation, so I quit in the trial month. The relief I felt walking out that day (before thinking about tomorrow) was one I will never forget.

I must admit it was scary. No new job lined up, on the verge of burnout and with savings for 2 months. I ended up in a new job in time before savings dried up, but it was too short to fully recharge my batteries. My new (and current job for 3 years now) was acceptable, although has gotten progressively worse. I now face a very similar situation…

In the end, it more or less worked out. Not a 100% happy story, but I survived. I simpley felt unable to take any other course of action at the time, so I guess I do not regret it.

I’m curious, what were your stressors ?

Mine:

  • Management imposing unrealistic deadlines and then criticizing when those deadlines are missed
  • Answering questions from junior devs - not being able to work in “the zone”
  • Working in a shitty office - construction noise nearby - small spaces
  • Working with consultants - who set their own schedule and are sometimes unreliable
  • Scrum - I hate it. Scrum = burn out

That seems very unfair. Hopefully you get more than 2 weeks pay if you get fired.

I’ve quit once in my life and it didn’t go well. My manager got the idea that I had to leave the office right away. I guess he thought I was a liability - that I would change passwords or destroy databases to get back at him. I had to leave with my stuff in front of everybody. It was humiliating.

That’s always on my mind when I think of quitting - having to go through that walk of shame again…

Oh, I could tell you stories! Suffice it to say, I was hired as a lead developer for an advertising agency which clearly missed the internet boat (I soon found out) and it turned out to be a paper position.

I was lead developer of a development team consisting of me, a designer turned self-taught script kid and an intern. To make matters worse, in reality I shared all responsibilities with the designer and the owner would always tap him for everything.

It quickly became apparent that the owner had no idea what he was doing, financially things were going from bad to worse. He was either shell-shocked or very resistent to any kind of change or good advice. It didn’t help matters that he had slept with the secretary (a young, sexy & ice-cold and unfortunately very real version of Dwight from The Office) and as his girlfriend, she was basically the clueless but powerful second-in-command.

I tried my very best, but my hands were basically tied from the beginning. I had no dev team, no authority, piles of work (nothing technically challenging, just a lot of it) with insane deadlines and no say in any of it. And all this from a shitty noisy office, surrounded by people who either loathed their jobs or had switched off completely.

One of these days I am going to write a book…

Yeah, the flip side is that the employer can’t fire you easily. He has to give twice the notice period, so in my case 4 months. There are also legal limitations.

I can imagine. At least you are out immediately afterwards?

I think I know how you feel. How’s the job situation in your area, would it be hard to line up a new job quickly? Do you have any connections? Have you made up your mind yet?

It is not good to hear this from you. I feel bad for you. I personally have not yet experienced this. But My friend stays in France. He lost his job after working 2 years in the Company. He also suddenly got an email and notice that he was fired. He was a senior Developer there. He even didn’t get the proper reason why he was fired. His work was also good. After that thing, he went into a major depression. He used to be stressed all the time. He doesn’t use to go anywhere. He Jus use to sit alone in his room.

Hello, it seems we’re in a similar situation. I’ve been working for a company in my country, and I encountered something quite embarrassing related to my job. My boss frequentl assign me many task, and whenever he comes to my office, I get stressed because I feel intimidated by him. Strangely, I’ve been having trouble sleeping, just like you. Despite these challenge, I haven’t quit my job. I’ve been doing my best and seeking advice. Many of my friends suggested staying calm to help me sleep better. I’m trying to do my best for this job.

Just sharing more experiences…

Thanks a lot.

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