Help Needed, Unemployed and Depressed

So Basically, i have a Bsc. In Environmental Engineering and an Msc in Public health. I have applied to countless of places and yet no replies not even an interview. I do not have any job experience due to this in my career path but i have job experiences in customer care and management as i have done some temporary jobs in such fields just to keep my mind busy. Sometimes i feel useless and that education was just a waste of my investment as i had to sink in millions to get educated abroad yet nothing to show for it. I battle depression and anxiety on a daily if not hourly basis and not even family or friends know because i smile and pretend like everything is alright. I sometimes wonder if this is the life path created for me or have i done something really wrong somewhere, i am devastated to say the least and i don’t really know if there’s a light at the end of this tunnel for me or is this tunnel my fate.
I’m just pouring my heart out hear where i think noone knows me, i have cried and had so many sleepless nights and i decided to pour my heart out here so if i do something to myself someday someone might know why.

I read your post and I feel bad for you.
I’ve experienced some similar things.

I am also having trouble supporting myself.
I feel depressed most of the time too.
I can’t sleep at night either.
I don’t have an education though.

I wanted to say I hope you don’t hurt yourself.
I don’t really have any advice.
I am still trying to fix my problems too.
I also thought you should know that someone read your post.
I really hope things get better for you.

Hello, Thank you so much for reaching out. I feel like i just found a soul friend that i can talk to. I have decided to take it a day at a time with a calm spirit. Do have a lovely day.

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What I’ve found over 7 years of professional software dev is that it’s very difficult to get a job without having someone recommend me, or without interviewing somewhere that’s familiar with the places that I’m coming from.

I have gotten some responses from resumes, usually I don’t. It’s frustrating because 100% of the time I think the job description is a good match for my skills and experience. It leaves one wondering where they went wrong, is it the content of the resume, the way the resume looks, did they google me and not like my face? Who knows. Sometimes I feel like it has to be incredibly arbitrary in some cases.

I’ve seen inexperienced developers get (in my opinion, undeserved) CTO positions because of their social skills, clout, being in the right place at the right time.

It’s a bit of a paradox. In some cases I feel like this industry takes technical assessment too far, and in other cases I feel like it completely eschews technical assessment in favor of nepotism and superficiality. It’s way easier to excel at the latter, way easier to shake someone’s hand than it is to invert a binary tree (I don’t even know what that is) on a whiteboard.

So basically I want to tell you that it’s a bunch of BS and you shouldn’t take it out on yourself.

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